Even when they learn at the same time, at the same place and from the same teachers, mane and women are so totally different whether they are in the drivers seat or the passenger seat.
Drivers
Men: enjoy revving the engine, they like the noise and can tell by the sound when something is wrong and if they detect a problem, they will often pop the hood, take a look, then bring it to a mechanic and tell him what they think is wrong and get it fixed.
Women: don't like to rev because there may some sound that the male hears and will want the hood popped and will make them late. If the female hears a sound indicating that there may be a problem and the male is not present, she will just turn the radio up loud enough to drown out the bad noise and carry on.
Men: like to get there first. If that means putting the “pedal to the metal”, weaving in and out of traffic and passing every other vehicle ahead of him on the highway…well, so be it.
Women: prefer to just leave on time in the first place, thereby making all the speeding and passing unnecessary. Besides, the noise from the engine isn't as loud at a lower rate of speed.
Men: cannot spot the huge department store having a sale that his female counterpart would like to check out but can spot a police cruiser seven blocks away or a twenty dollar bill blowing down a back alley.
Women: cannot see the big flashy sports bar advertising “the big game” but easily spot the romantic little bar and grill tucked in behind the department store. Occasionally they may have some difficulty spotting the odd stop sign and other cars with turn signals or brake lights on. This only usually occurs when the male is making commands from the passenger seat and distracting her.
Passengers
Men: at times will express a desire for the female to drive faster and then for some reason get scared, fearing for his life when she chooses to obey him. This is where the imaginary brake pedal comes into play.
Women: get fearful when the male drives in his usual manner and at times, will request that the male slow down. When she does this one of two things could happen, he may either hit warp speed, creating utter silence from the female or pull the vehicle over to a complete stop and offer to let her drive…his mistake.
Men: will bark orders - turn left! Watch out for the curb! There's a tree over there, go around it! Even when the female obviously knows what she is doing. This is as dangerous for the men as asking the female to drive faster because it makes the female angry and distracted and she will very likely do the opposite of the given order.
Women: will spot a squirrel or a turtle or a billboard on the side of the road, and a loud, sharp, intake of breath will ensue, after which the male slam on the brakes, sometimes swerve into oncoming traffic in his confusion. After determining that there is no large animals stepping out onto the road, he will then give the female “the look” and she will no longer be allowed to vocalize, in any way, her concern for anything for the rest of the ride.
