As I was standing at the top of the stairwell, I gazed downward with utter and complete horror on my face- the horde; they had arrived. With their ragged clothing, broken speech, foodpacks spilling from their baggage, and a complete lack of decorum they trudged upwards- an enduring and manic gaze plastered over their unwashed and dirtied visages as they screamed obscenities and unintelligeble curses. What would I do? Doing my best to create a welcoming, but commanding voice, I uttered two simple words which for a moment paused their rampage and brought them into the more cultured surroundings they were in, "Tickets please."
While the allusion to a barbarian invasion may seem a bit absurd, it is in fact very much what many Theater professionals feel when they see the audience make their way into the house. While we are dressed nicely and do our best to seem well spoken, respectful, and polite, we meet groups of people who enter wearing dirty or ragged clothing, speaking loudly and rudely, and utterly ignoring every rule or guideline set out before them. Therefore, I've compiled this short list to make it easier for patrons of the theater to understand some basic rules, guidelines.
1. Be on time
This is by far the most important thing I can tell you. Be on time. When you're late, you disturb the entire audience and the cast when the ushers take you in at late seating (and if you think that they can't see a door crack from on stage, you're utterly wrong). Check the time of your ticket the day before. Then check it again the morning of. Plan to be at the theater an hour early just to be safe. If that means that you end up standing around for half an hour before the show, oftentimes you can easily find something to do to spend the time until they open the doors and let you within the theater. Consider it this way, what's more valuable? 30 minutes out of the time that would otherwise be spent doing something probably mindless and not economic at home- or 30 minutes out of the time that the show is going on, 30 minutes worth of a $96 ticket?
2. No outside food or drink.
This is most likely the most often broken rule. People bring in food and drink all the time, thinking our ploy is to get more money from them by selling them our concessions. This is simply not true. At many houses, they get some revenue from the sale of food or drink, but at other houses, they contract out the concessions to other companies and recieve very little to no revenue from the sales of concessions and only get payment for the rented space.
The reason that food or drink is not allowed in many houses is because of the resulting pests such as rats, mice, and bugs from the resulting mess. When people bring food and drink into the theater, when there is a no food or drink rule, it means that the cleaning crew needs to spend more time cleaning up crumbs, spills, and wrappers, which results in overtime pay for them, which then gets bumped into your ticket prices. Keep the food and drink out, keep profit margins up, keep your tickets less expensive.
Now of course, this rule differs from theater to theater but in general, food and drink is not allowed inside the house (the seating area). Unless there is a sign posted saying that it is allowed, please consume your candy, soda, popcorn, whiskey sour, peanuts, mocha latte, sandwich, wine, pizza, fried chicken (yes, it happens) or other food or beverage in the lobby. Exceptions to this rule are of course dinner theaters where anything is allowed, and bottled water which is allowed in most theaters, and even occasionally soda if it is in their specified cups. To avoid any confusion, ask an usher as you walk into the theater if any food or beverage is allowed within the theater.
If the usher says food and drink is not allowed, please do not sneak it in. We see it, we know about it, and we will bust you- it's really not that hard to watch for a hand to mouth movement, so you're pretty easily spotted. Don't make us do it, we really would prefer not to as it disturbs other audience members and causes embarassment for you, and us too. Just don't do it.
3. No photography inside the theater.
This is probably the second most often broken rule. Inside the house of every Broadway theater, and most other theaters, you are not allowed to take photos within the house itself period. This means during pre-show, during the show, intermission, or afterwards. From time to time, you may not even be allowed to take photos within the lobby. It may seem ridiculous, but the rules are like that for a reason. The safety aspect of not taking photos within the theater during the performance may be obvious, but the legal reasons for not taking photos beforehand may seem a bit more obscure. Due to copyrights, people aren't allowed to take photos of the stage at all, and oftentimes that includes the entire theater.
